3 pieces of advice I would give to my younger self | Knowledge and joy

Photo of Melissa Ohollandt to Everygirl

I recently saw an Instagram post from a creator who outlined all the things she had learned about herself in the years she had lived (it was her thirty-ninth birthday). I loved the idea of ​​sharing a small sample of things I’ve learned from stumbling through my own life in hopes that it might help someone else out there too.

Today I’m sharing three pieces of advice I would (if I could) give myself younger me.

If you’re in the mood for some introspection of your own, I think this would be a really insightful writing exercise to try for yourself. Your answers may surprise you, and they may be more informative to your current life than you may realize at first.

On the power of “boring”

1. Remember that boredom is not a bad thing.

You have developed a level of intensity in life that can sometimes get in the way of enjoying the little things. Try to remember that being bored is not a bad thing.

If you’re not experiencing highs and lows at work, it doesn’t necessarily mean you’re in the wrong job. If there is no burning passion in your relationship, that doesn’t mean it’s boring. Over time, you’ll learn that making more “boring” choices is often better for your overall well-being, whether it’s leaning into a quiet relationship or coming home early from a night out.

You have developed a level of intensity in life that can sometimes get in the way of enjoying the little things. Try to remember that being bored is not a bad thing.

About mental health

2. It is not enough to simply feel your ADHD.

Simply noticing your ADHD is not enough, although it is a meaningful first step. You actually have to do the work with managing that. Work with a mental health professional that can give you the tools to manage your ADHD, rather than trying to fight through it yourself, will make a world of difference. This applies to any other mental disorder you may encounter during your lifetime.

On relationships

3. You don’t stop being the person you were before you met your partner.

You don’t suddenly become a different person when you commit to being with someone else. All the quirks and tendencies you had before you met your partner remain. And the things you love most about the person when you meet them also end up being the things that annoy you the most.

This does not mean that there is anything wrong with the relationship; it’s more about the choices you make after you realize this. If you can find a way to cultivate your relationship despite your differences and points of contention, you will build a relationship based on a foundation of trust.

Joe recently said this during an argument: “I wish you knew that I will always choose you.” I told him the next day that I will work on taking his word for it.

Author’s Note: This is from the perspective of someone in a monogamous relationship, but this point of view can certainly apply to ethical non-monogamous relationships as well. The values ​​of integrity, respect and trust can be applied in any type of ethical partnership that exists.

Related Posts